Archive for March, 2010

What $50 Can Do At CVS

I was blessed (mucho blessed) to have someone send me $50 in CVS gift cards a few weeks ago.

I put myself on a mission to see just how much I could get for $50 at CVS.

Now, for you serious couponers, you might cringe at my photos. Looking back at my receipts, I think that I could have done a smidge better than I did. But I’m not gonna be too hard on myself… I mean, look at all that I DID get for $50….

I was sad to use the last of those gift cards. It was a good run though…

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1 Pantene shampoo

1 Pantene conditioner

1 Tide detergent

1 Fusion razor

2 Oral B toothbrushes

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4 Degree deodorants

2 Dove deodorants

2 CoverGirl lipstains

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2 jumbo packs Pampers

1 Colgate senstive toothpaste

2 mini Cadbury eggs

1 CoverGirl simply ageless corrector (this was not necessary, but since it gave Extra Bucks and I had the gift card I used it as my excuse to try it)

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4 Stayfree (sorry fellas. Hey, it’s life.)

1 package of jellybeans (no ECBs here, but I needed potty treats to reward the regressing potty trainer)

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2 Huggies jumbo packs

1 travel pack of Huggies wipes

1 Fusion razor

1 Fusion cartridges

1 Sunday paper :)

I’ll spare you the breakdown of how much each order was and all that jazz, but I will tell you that I saved about $150.

Well, I’m off to bed. The kids kept me busy today…cleaning up a half gallon of vegetable oil off the floor and two little girls. Too bad I didn’t use those gift cards to buy any Dawn dish detergent to cut the GREASE that now runs through my kitchen floor…

Ergh.

Crocodile Tears and an Insane Dose of Cuteness

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He’s cute even when he’s mad.

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Those eyes are gonna kill some girls someday.

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His thumb makes it all better. Someday, I’m gonna miss this when he doesn’t do it anymore.

Either that, or I’m gonna start thinkin’ that it’s not so cute when he’s like, 12.

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Here’s a pic from our trip to the beach today. Daddy had to hike up Caia’s pants because, well…because she can’t stay out of the ocean.

Even when it’s 54 degrees.

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And finally…my beach lovin’ babe.

Mommy Guilt and a Trip to Target

Anyone who’s a Mommy has experienced, on some level, Mommy Guilt.

It can pop up like a mean monster over ridiculous things (”I let her play outside without a jacket on! She’s gonna catch pneumonia! Probably need breathing treatments all winter! I’ll feel terrible having to give her breathing treatments…it’s all my fault!”), or…it can be an underlying theme in the day (”I should be playing with them more. They shouldn’t be watching so much TV. I should feed them more fish…you know, brain food. Or fish oil. Or flax seed. Or whatever else you’re supposed to feed them that good mothers feed their kids.”)

I’m not the only one who thinks these things am I?, she asked sheepishly.

Well, tonight my Mommy Guilt Monster rears its ugly head with a vengeance.

Tonight was my night to “get away” from the madness. And oh, what madness it was! Once Kenni got home from school, she was tired and hungry and the biggest Cranky Pants I’ve ever seen. Caia was fascinated with playing with the water hose (I’ve got to figure out how to keep her away from that thing!), and screamed when I told her that “we” weren’t going to play with it…which essentially woke up her brother.

(Side note: Why do  moms use that elusive “we” in the whole “we aren’t going to do that” scenarios we throw at our kids? Who’s “we”? I wasn’t interested in that water hose, so no, WE are not going to be doing ANYTHING with it…)

But about that Mommy Guilt Monster…

I decided, as all women do when you don’t know WHAT to do, to head to Target. I was given a budget…$20.

Now, I hesitate to finish the rest of my post, because you know as well as I do where I’m going with this don’t you?

At first, I put some pairs of shorts and shirts into my buggy for Caia…her quick approach to the age of three has cause a little growth spurt for her. While she’s still as skinny as a rail, she’s actually pushing the next size up because of her surge in height. (I say “surge”, but it was more like “inching”…details, details.) But don’t fret GiGi and Aunt Victoria, those 2T dresses will still fit for Easter and the wedding! :)

Then I decided I would pick up a new nail polish color. In days of old, pre-babies and diapers and hours and hours of laundry, I used to have acrylic nails with a beautiful french manicure. (I still drool a little over people’s hands who sport those, although, I think they may kind of be on their way out. Or  maybe that’s just here in Charleston…or maybe I’m just not hanging around the right people.) Anyway, I decided I was going to add a little color to my life, because it’s been so long since I actually bought something for ME, something that I would enjoy.

So I picked out a bright yellow and a bright orange color…cheapest brand I could find (ladies, remember NYC make-up? It was that.). I bought the cheapo mainly because I didn’t know if I would really like it once I got it home, and I didn’t want to feel guilty for having spent 4 bucks on something that was going to waste.

But, of course, since I was already there in the make-up section, I had to look at the lip colors. (Small confession: I really LOVE make-up! I don’t buy a ton cause it’s spendy, but I LOVE fresh lipstick and eyeshadow and blush and mascara and eyeliners…you name it, I love it. It’s just so…PRETTY. Insert dreamy sigh…)

Before I knew it, I had a new lipstick (again, the cheapie because…what if I don’t like it?), and  an eye pencil sharpener.

Then, I thought, while I’m looking at color, I might as well see if they have any summer shirts on clearance or something.

Wouldn’t you know? They DID!

Now, I was keeping a close look at my budget and my $20 limit. And I must’ve added everything up in my head 34 times just to make sure…and sure enough, when I checked out, my total was $19.87. (That was a…not so good year. I was in middle school in 1987. I wouldn’t repeat middle school again if you PAID me.)

But…oh my gosh, I feel terrible, but I ended up with NOTHING in my buggy that was for anyone but….me.

Ugh. I even put back Caia’s shorts and shirts. What a mom. :(

I just—I just—

Well, I got nothing…other than…

I just decided I wanted something for…me.

Sigh.

The Mommy Guilt Monster strikes again.

Someday, SOMEDAY, I’m taking the Mommy Guilt Monster OUT.

Maybe I’ll be armed with my bottle of orange nail polish.

Ducky and Caia (part 2)

CONTINUED…

Caia DID fall asleep that night, with her fingers resting on her chin and an arm thrown up over her head.

Normally the fingers are in her mouth and the arm is wrapped around Ducky, his tag pulled close to her face so she rub it while she goes to sleep.

The next day, Stephen took the girls to the Spring Fling at school, and I spent the morning at home with Jack while we did some cleaning for Uncle Chris and Aunt Victoria who were coming to visit.

Around lunchtime, I got a text from my friend Laurie.

I’m holding Ducky for ransom. You’re free to come get him just be prepared to pay the price…the high price…we know how much he means to Caia. hahaha

Now, of course, Laurie was kidding that she was holding him for ransom.

But it seemed too good to be true that she could actually HAVE him.

Immediately, I called her.

And I found myself sitting down on the floor by the time I listened to her tell me that her daughter had come running out of her room that morning holding the missing friend, proclaiming,

I found Ducky! I found Ducky!

Laurie and her family didn’t even know that Ducky was missing.

She told me that she wondered why she hadn’t heard from me when she found Ducky…because usually when Ducky goes wandering he’s at a friend’s house and I have to call around and see who’s seen him last.

I explained to her that I hadn’t called her because I was just sure that Ducky was gone. Forever.

It was Laurie’s house that we had been at for the small group meeting…but you will remember that Stephen insisted that Caia did not bring Ducky with her to their house.

Whether or not she REALLY had Ducky at their house that night or whether or not Ducky was providentially placed there…well, you know what? I don’t know.

But I do know that I know that I KNOW that I prayed for Ducky’s return, knowing full well and accepting that God could choose not to bring that toy back, but still I had to ask.

I had to ask for my little girl.

And here they are.

Together again.

reunion

Ducky and Caia (part 1)

What follows is a tale of loss, heartbreak, loneliness, revival, reunion, and love.

Thursday, March 18th–I dropped McKenna off at school, and then headed to the pediatrician’s office with Jack and Caia for Jack’s (long overdue) 12 month appointment. As always, I made sure that Ducky and Wooby were with us.

If you know Caia, you know Ducky.

Ducky is a floppy, yellow, well-worn, well-loved stuffed biohazard duck.

Ducky came to live with us one Christmas by way of GiGi and PawPaw. It was a year later that Caia adopted him as her lovey. We’re not sure how or why she chose to make him her “lovey”, but shortly before Jack made his way onto the Parris scene, she began to cling to Ducky and take him everywhere.

Since Ducky’s entrance to our family, he has been almost like another child to keep up with. He goes EVERYWHERE. Literally, everywhere.

We have gone back to many a friend’s house, many a store, many a restaurant to retrieve Ducky.

But back to my story at hand…

After being left in the doctor’s exam room for close to an hour waiting on Jack’s iron and lead test results (which were fine, by the way…the nurse simply FORGOT about us…and THAT is another story in and of itself, but I’ll choose to repress my feelings here for the sake of the story at hand)…anyway, when we finally were given the results and realized that the nurse was headed out to lunch duty without releasing us (grr), I was in such a rush to leave that office, that I hastily picked up everything that I thought we had brought and shuffled them out the door for some long overdue lunch.

Caia had been intrigued by the trash can at the doctor’s office that day. Maybe it was because I had told her to throw something away for me, and the fact that it was encased in a cabinet was…appealing? I don’t know…but let’s just keep this important fact in mind for the rest of the story.

We rushed through Chick Fil A for lunch, grabbed Kenni at school, and came home for a nap for Jack. I spent the rest of the afternoon waiting (impatiently) for Stephen to come home so that I could make it out to a birthday dinner for some friends of mine. (Again, another story in and of itself about miscommunication between a husband and a wife about time…but I would like to say that if your event is on the calendar with the correct time written next to it, you win the argument. Period. Thank you. Just call me The Marriage Ref.)

My absence for the early evening meant that Stephen was required to feed and gather together the children and their belongings to take out to a small group meeting for the church.

After we came home that night, the search for Ducky began.

We turned an already messy house upside down looking for Caia’s friend.

She has a habit of putting Ducky IN things…he has shown up in my bread machine, the play kitchen, the step stool in the bathroom (I never said Ducky was a CLEAN duck), the closet…

And although we looked EVERYWHERE and in everyTHING, Ducky was nowhere to be found.

Stephen insisted that she had not taken him to the small group meeting that night, and I certainly didn’t remember seeing him either.

Caia went to bed that night a very sad little girl.

And her mommy cried like a baby.

In one of the Esther videos in the Beth Moore bible study, Beth quotes a lady who said, “You’re only as happy as your saddest child.”

And I had one sad, sad child.

I know that it is “just” a stuffed animal. But, to her, Ducky is a friend. He is her solace.

As I sat down on the edge of the bed, a very sobering thought hit me.

She had REALLY been interested in that garbage can at the doctor’s office. And she likes to put Ducky IN things.

OH NO. DUCKY WAS IN THAT GARBAGE CAN.

Frantic, I got into the car and drove to the pediatrician’s office. At 11:30 at night. I don’t know what I thought I was going to find at that hour. I had a small spot of hope that MAYBE he had fallen out of the car and was on the sidewalk, or MAYBE someone was still in that dr’s office, or maybe…some kind nurse found him, knew that a child would be missing their lovey that night and had placed him outside the front door.

Desperation and an urge to “fix” things for your chid will make you think crazy things.

Obviously, I found nothing.

And the next morning, the requests for Ducky began in earnest.

A 7:00 a.m. phone call to the doctor’s office yielded nothing. No duck had been turned in and that trash was long gone.

A trip to the local Belk store where original Ducky was purchased proved fruitless as well.

Even though I knew a replacement Ducky was not going to hold the same value as THE Ducky.

We moved our search to Target, hoping that I could find something that at least LOOKED like Ducky.

We found a large stuffed duck that she seemed to enjoy. We named him Ducky 2. We went about our day.

But as day turned to night and it was time to go to bed, Ducky 2 was no longer cutting the mustard.

She would hold Ducky 2 for a moment or so, then gingerly toss him out of the bed onto the floor and say,

I don’t want that.

She would pick him up and try again. But it was for naught.

She wouldn’t even suck her two middle fingers like she has since she was 6 weeks old. She held them on her chin and said,

I can’t.

My heart broke for her.

I sat by her bed and cried big tears for her.

I thought of Ducky…cold and alone in a big dumpster somewhere.

Ducky was well-loved…and to have been thrown out with the trash seemed…so…harsh.

I had wanted to keep Ducky, even when the fascination fades, so that I could pass him onto her in years to come. A keepsake. A piece of her innocent childhood.

After she was asleep that night, I went up to her room, knelt beside her and stroked her hair.

And I prayed.

God, I know this seems impossible, but could You please bring Ducky home?

TO BE CONTINUED….

Nothing Is Sacred

I have discovered that as a mommy, and especially a mommy of many littles, that there really is NOTHING that’s just mine anymore.

Not my food….somebody always wants a “bite”.

Not my bed…someone’s always crawling in it in the middle of the night or going to sleep in it because they can’t sleep in the same room as their sister.

Not my clothes…my t-shirts are for nightshirts for the big one, and my shoes and other items are for dress-up.

Not my toothbrush…Jack throws things like that in the toilet.

Not my make-up…again, dress-up.

Not my phone or my computer…those are toys to entertain the children.

Not my books or my magazines…those are for coloring and drawing in.

They wrecked my actual physical person when they were sharing it with me for nine months. So, that’s not even the same anymore.

Not my time, not my radio, not my TV.

There is a long-standing joke among mommies about how we hide in the bathroom (or the pantry) sneaking the last of the chocolate because, really…we’re kind of just tired of sharing.

This is not even going to be one of those posts that ends all sweet and sappy and sentimental.

I mean, I love my kids. I do. I’d give them the shirt off my back. And I have…

But being a mommy is like living in a socialist economy or something. Everything that you thought was yours is really for the masses.

Baby Gone

I’m not sure what the exact point is when a baby makes that transition from baby to…(excuse me while I grab a hanky)…TODDLER.

Now I guess we could get all technical and say that it’s when they begin…”toddling”. But, you know what I mean, right?

The point where the baby actions and baby motions and baby mannerisms give way to their little personalities.

The point where they actually start playing with toys the CORRECT way, not just looking at them and trying to eat them.

My baby Jack is no longer my BABY Jack.

He’s big boy Jack.

Sniff, sniff…

He loves to throw balls, hit things with sticks (or plastic golf clubs or his sister’s princess wand), rolls cars on the carpet.

Just yesterday he said “ball” while we were playing outside. He loves the water table. He loves screaming and then laughing hysterically and running away.

He loves…um…playing in the toilet.

He stops to watch TV. He dances to music. He reaches and opens and closes his hands for things and people he wants.

He runs up to me and throws himself at me and says, “Mama!”

And that….oh that warms my heart.

MELTS my heart.

BREAKS my heart…because I KNOW how fast his precious little baby days have flown by.

It’s moments like this, the moments where I realize that this whole babyhood/little kid stage really is just a fleeting moment, that make me reevaluate how I’m spending the majority of my time during each day.

I know what I’m doing tomorrow…I’m playing with my kids.

Because in NO TIME AT ALL he’s gone from THIS….

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To THIS…

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Love him.

Who Needs Monet? I’ve Got McKenna

Back during the summer, I found giant manilla drawing paper on super clearance at Target for $.74 a pack. I’ve been saving it in the cabinet for a rainy day.

Okay, that’s not true.

I forgot I bought it.

So today, as Caia was attempting to draw on my walls and my handmade-by-my-father-in-law wooden tray, I rushed for paper.

And…aha! Gold mine!

Now Caia is a pretty good little colorer (is that a word?) for one who is not yet 3. She has very good fine motor skills and can pretty much color inside the lines. (She still pee pees in her pants a lot too, so the advancement in one area leaves me baffled by the delay in another…but that’s just me.)

But when McKenna saw that fresh stack of untouched paper and a pencil box holding fresh crayons, well…I lost her.

She did nothing for the next two hours but draw. Even refusing dinner.

But, a while back, Stephen and I said that we were going to do everything we could to encourage her art, if that’s what she wanted to do. So, I didn’t make a big deal out of it. I just CASUALLY slipped a bowl of Spaghettios in front of her at one point. (Yes. I feed my kids Spaghettios. When Stephen is working, the most “cooking” that I do usually involves a can opener and a microwave.)

And here are some of the results of two hours of art…

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I think this one is my fave. This is her on a plane to Africa. The wheels are down because the plane has just landed. You will notice an elephant, a giraffe, the front view of a lion (note the paws and mane…it’s the front view and that’s why it looks kind of like an ape-man…)

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I’m not real sure what we’ve got here. Some sort of creature and lots of swirls and diamonds. She was pretty proud that she could draw diamonds.

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She watched Monsters vs. Aliens today. Here we have Bob, I’m not sure who that one is…maybe the President?, Ginormica, Dr. Cockroach, and Insectosaurus.

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This is a picture of her on a ladder painting. The wall was red and she is painting it blue. We also have an Easter egg…interesting tidbit: she drew the rectangles for the designs and THEN went back and outlined the egg.

And this one is actually not from today, but it was so cute that I had to include it while I’m displaying my McKenna Masterpieces…

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This is from Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs. We have Flint’s dad (seriously. If you’ve seen this movie, that looks JUST LIKE HIM!), Flint Lockwood, and Steve the Monkey.

If anyone is interested in owning an original McKenna, the artist can be contacted at…

Being Brave

Wanna know what I’m learning right now?

That GOD is my refuge. That in GOD I will find my peace, my rest, my wholeness.

That, through Him, I can persevere. I can be brave.

This is a tough lesson for me.

You see, when I feel overwhelmed with the kids, with the house, with the daily activities and stresses that come with being a wife, a mom, a pastor’s wife…I often vent out my frustrations to Stephen.

And he is constantly telling me that he needs me to be brave.

Everytime he says it, I just want to stomp and scream and shout that I don’t WANT to be brave! I don’t WANT to push through it! I don’t WANT to keep my chin up!

I want to sink to my knees, have a good cry, eat some chocolate, and relax in a hot bath while you give me the night off. For the next week.

That’s what I want.

In the Esther bible study that I am working on (by Beth Moore…uh huh!), she mentioned the in Proverbs 31:10 the word “noble” means something…strong.

A wife of noble character who can find

She points out the origin of this word “noble” is, in essence, an army term that means “brave”.

And if we want to find a brave woman, we have to look no further than to the book of Esther. Esther, who upon realizing what she had to do to save her people, decided to approach the king…knowing it could cost her her life.

And yet she said,

And if I perish, I perish.

That seems pretty brave to me.

Oh, that I may follow in the footsteps of Esther. And know that “IF ______ (Beth Moore had us fill in the blank with what our worst fear would be, but here I say IF ANYTHING), then GOD.”

Simply GOD.

If I have to put the kids to bed every night by myself for two weeks straight and they all resist bedtime and I’m up until 10:00 p.m. dealing with it, then GOD will take care of me.

If the two year old pitches tantrums all day, the teething baby whines and refuses naps, and the five year old has the sassiest mouth this side of the Mason-Dixon line, then GOD will take care of me.

If there is no rest for me for days on end and if the cat food bag bursts and spills all over the floor and if the neighbors have a party on Friday night (like they’re doing right now) and the screaming kids outside wake up my kids, then GOD.

If I don’t get to hang out with the girls because my husband has to work late, if I feel a little lonely every now and then, if everyone else seems to have something that they’re wonderful at but I’m struggling to figure mine out, then GOD.

Then…God. THEN…GOD.

Then God will take care of me. God will be my Rest, my Refuge, my Defender, my Deliverer, my Comfort, my Peace.

Just—

GOD.

#245 on the list of Things A Mommy Who’s In Her RIght Mind Should Never Do

…Take three children ages 5, 2 1/2, and 14 months to the pediatrician for a “sick” visit for the youngest two during what should be naptime.

Oh, and…during a nice little monsoon, too.

Yes, yes. THAT’S always so fun.

The littles have been sick with a cold for a few days, but I was afraid of the dreaded (gasp!) EAR INFECTION…so I decided this morning that we were going to go to the doctor. We just HAD to, I thought.

Why, oh why oh WHY, didn’t I even think about the weather?

And the fact that the appointment time they gave me was right after school so I would have all three kids…and it would also be right smack dab in the middle of what SHOULD be naptime for Jack.

As I pull up to the closest parking spot to the office door that I could find, I’m thinking over and over to myself, This is THE worst possible day I could’ve picked to do this.

In fact, I think that I thought it so much that I actually said it outloud because McKenna said, “No it’s not, Mom.”

I wanted to argue with her that, No. A sunny day at say, 10:00 in the morning would have been a MUCH nicer time to do this.

Or better yet…not at all. Since everyone was diagnosed with common colds, give ‘em Zyrtec, and have a nice day.

Don’t get me wrong. Doc is super nice, and I like him a lot…(I still miss Super Pediatrician, though. Feel like I lost a friend…)

I just don’t want to be pegged as the mom who brings her kid in for every little sniffle.

(And I think I might be getting that rap…but I guess that’s better than the neglectful mom, I suppose.)

We didn’t have to wait long to get into a room, but by the time we did everyone’s hair and clothes were soaking wet and everyone had granola bar and chocolate chip smudges all over their clothes.

I felt like THAT lady. The one who brings in her dirty, sick, and wet  kids(because she doesn’t have an umbrella big enough or enough arms to carry three kids AND a diaper bag AND a purse AND an umbrella).

Caia had on Crocs with no socks because she had stepped in an ant bed a few days ago and the bites on her feet were making her resistant to wearing shoes. It was all I could do to get her to throw those on. But throw ‘em on she did…and Little Miss “I DO IT!” decided that I couldn’t fix them once she had them on…the wrong feet.

Once in the docs office, the girls chased each other giggling, and Jack opened every drawer and emptied out all the nebulizer kits and threw them on the ground. (They were all wrapped in plastic so it’s okay.)

Then there was a fight over who got to hold which book and who got to play with Mommy’s phone and “that’s not fair” and “I’m gonna bite you” and “She said she was gonna bite me”….

Caia was beside herself over something so she stood up in a chair and screamed at the top of her lungs (pretty sure the nurses had Child Protective Services on hold at that point)…then, my usually calm and docile little angel starting kicking the wall.

Can we say overtired? And Terrible Twos?

That was the point where I wanted to pack it all up and quietly exit the building.

Only I pretty sure we weren’t going to be doing ANYTHING quietly at this point. So I decided to wait it out.

Then Jack tripped and fell over the doctor’s rolling stool thingie and hit his head on the floor.

That produced massive wails…all while the other two are now, LITERALLY, rolling around on the floor.

So I tell Kenni to get up off the floor because this is a doctor’s office and floors at a doctor’s office are dirty because people throw up on them and have potty accidents on them…

And she proceeds to LOUDLY reiterate that,

People PEE PEE on these floors?!?!?!

I’m just waiting for someone to show up at the door and tell me that it’s time for me to leave.

But finally, the Nice Doctor Man arrives, tells me that they have colds (possibly allergies…beautiful.), recommends Zyrtec, and makes sure I schedule that overdue 12 month check-up for Jack. (And I really have been meaning to do that…so his helpful urging just made me go ahead and do it. Plus he told me to tell the nurses that he would work me in whenever I wanted to…Yay for good doctors who make their patients (or patients MOMs, in this case) feel special. Whether they are or not.)

But I am MOST DEFINITELY canceling that appointment if it starts raining or if I have to take all three of my musketeers out to that office at the same time again.